Riding beyond fear: transforming anxieties into joy with mindfulness

Apr 18

Written By Lara Meyer

Deep breath iiiiiin, pause, deep breath out. Phew.

Sit up straight, engage my core, look straight ahead…

Annd again deep breath in, deep breath oooooout. Pheeeew.

Look straight ahead, notice the various colors, shades, and textures around me.

Deep breath in, deep breath out.

My little mantra

This was the little mantra running through my mind as I prepared for my first-ever horse riding experience. Until last week, I had never had the opportunity to ride a horse. The reason I found myself on horseback was due to my husband winning a horse riding experience in a raffle. Can you believe it!?

When my husband won the experience, I was thrilled! I love trying new things, exploring different parts of this beautiful island of Bahrain, and engaging in unique experiences. The opportunity to go horse riding ticked so many of those boxes, and I literally couldn't wait. In fact, I was so eager that I was pestering my husband to book the experience right away. However, as the experience day approached, I began to hear little saboteur voices in my head, worrying about what might happen.

The voice of my saboteurs intruded

Starting quietly they posed a few sneery questions to me:

"What if you don't like it?

“Worse, what if you can't do it?”

“Worse still, what if you fall off and get hurt, ending up in the hospital with a broken leg or back?"

My body started to tense up as my shoulders rose towards my ears. I realised I was biting the inside of my cheeks, one of my classic tells when I'm stressed.

As my husband casually prepared for our outing, looking up directions and getting ready to leave, my anxiety grew.

"Are you ready?" he innocently asked.

"Of course, I'm not ready!" I snapped back. "I only have this outfit to wear, and I'm not sure if it's right. There's no information on the website, except that riders must be under 100 kilograms. I threw away the scales months ago because weighing myself made me sad and mad. And so now I don't even know if I weigh less than 100 kilograms anymore."

He laughed, reassuring me, "Of course, you're less than 100 kilograms! Why are you even thinking about that? It will be fine. We're going to have a great time."

By this point, my saboteurs had taken hold, attacking me where they knew I was most vulnerable—my appearance and weight. I realised I needed a serious intervention to counter these destructive thoughts.

Calming my mind

As we got into the car, I explained to my husband that I needed to spend some time practicing my PQ reps. If you've been reading my posts for a while, you'll know that PQ reps are a way of commanding the mind. They help to gently bring back wandering thoughts to a focal point, whether it's the breath or a physical sensation like touching fingertips together.

Essentially, PQ reps are a form of meditation that allows you to take control of your thoughts.

So, during the car journey, I focused on my PQ reps, gradually calming the anxious thoughts stirred up by my saboteurs. I could feel the tension releasing from my shoulders as I practiced. I decided to show myself empathy for feeling nervous about trying something new. It was natural to have concerns, and I chose to replace my worries with kind, compassionate reframing.

"You bring courage to new situations and experiences," I told myself.

Upon arriving at the horse riding center, I immersed myself in the vibrant sights and sounds—beautiful horse colors, the smell of stables, and the lively chatter of fellow riders. I tapped into my inner wisdom, reassuring myself that everything would be okay, regardless of the outcome of this experience.

However, as we prepared to mount the horses, my anxiety resurfaced. What if I fell off? What if I couldn't handle it?

These thoughts overwhelmed me.

However, with the gentle encouragement of our guide, I managed to mount the horse and began to follow my PQ reps again.

Deep breath iiiiiin, pause, deep breath out. Phew.
Sit up straight, engage my core, look straight ahead…
Annd again deep breath in, deep breath oooooout. Pheeeew.
Look straight ahead, notice the various colors, shades, and textures around me.
Deep breath in, deep breath out.

For the first 10 to 15 minutes of riding, I focused solely on my breath and the environment around me.

This practice helped me calm down enough to truly enjoy the experience. As we reached the end of the trail and turned towards the beach, a stunning sight greeted us—sand stretching out before me, the sky turning a magnificent pink as the sun set, and the footprints of horses that had walked this path before us.

Now I was calm, I was filled with absolute joy and wonder at the beauty of the world around me.

By fully engaging my senses and being present in the moment, I was able to appreciate and enjoy the experience to the fullest. My initial anxieties transformed into a wide smile!

Personal reflections

As I reflect on my first horse riding experience, I realise that stepping out of my comfort zone was not just about riding a horse—it was about confronting my fears and saboteur voices head-on.

It taught me the importance of practicing self-compassion and empathy when facing new challenges.

By engaging in my PQ reps and shifting my focus to the present moment, I was able to transform anxiety into wonder and joy. This experience reminded me that growth often lies just beyond our fears, waiting to be embraced with curiosity and courage.

While new experiences like horse-riding are not part of everyones weekly challenges, but I do bet there are loads of things that might cause you to feel stressed, anxious, upset, worried or unhappy. Maybe its a tough meeting with your boss, or having to reprimand a teenager for their behaviour, or giving some growth feedback to a team member, or something else.

Whatever it is, I encourage you to consider how you can identify and manage your own anxieties and saboteurs.

Notice when self-doubt or fear creeps in, and instead of letting it take over, practice redirecting your thoughts with mindfulness techniques like PQ reps. Challenge negative self-talk with affirmations of self-compassion and courage.

Journalling and reflection prompts

What situations trigger anxiety or self-doubt for you?
How do you typically respond to these triggers?
What self-compassionate practices can you incorporate to manage anxious thoughts?
In what ways can you shift your focus from fear to curiosity in challenging moments?