Harnessing a 3:1 Ratio: Turning Negative Thoughts into Positive Action
Did you know that for every single negative thought we have, we need three positive thoughts to counteract its impact? At first glance, this might seem like a lot. But the reality is, our human brains are wired for negativity and so bringing that 3:1 ratio can take a bit of practice.
Argh - negative thoughts are everywhere!
Before you start practicing bringing more positive thoughts into your life - its easy for the negtive ones to keep cropping up, just like in these examples taken from some of my clients of late…
Imagine you're preparing for an important presentation at work. As you review your slides, a critical voice creeps in, whispering, "You're slides don’t look perfect, look at the different fonts as you flick through - how did you not spot this before?!" This self-criticism can quickly overshadow your confidence and undermine your abilities when its time to stand up and share your knowledge and expertise.
Imagine a meeting with your manager where they were showering you with praise for all the things you did well in a recent project, but there is ONE area to work on… You come out of that meeting worrying “You idiot, you always leave something to be desired, now you’ll never be good enough to get that next promotion”. This self-doubt can keep you up at night and hold yourself back from going for the promotion you want
And outside of work it can be just as easy to trigger these negative thoughts…
Imagine scrolling through Instagram, admiring posts from friends and colleagues. Suddenly, you start comparing yourself, thinking, "I'll never be as successful or happy as them. What's wrong with me?" This comparison leads to feelings of inadequacy and diminishes your sense of self-worth.
Breaking the negativity spiral
Maybe its obvious from those examples, but I’m going to say it anyway, these kind of negative thoughts have a profound impact on our emotions and ultimately our behaviours. They erode confidence, fuel self-doubt, and cloud our perception of reality.
What starts as a fleeting thought can quickly spiral into a pattern of negative self-talk... And once that spiral takes hold, it can be really hard to break out of.
So how do we break out of that negative thought spiral?
Firstly just knowing about the 3:1 positive to negative ratio is a good start! Being aware of this helps us consciously choose more positive thoughts, even when our mind is automatically veering towards the negative!
And the more and more we practice this effort over time, the stronger our positive thinking muscle grows and the easier it becomes to stay in that magic 3:1 ratio and think and feel more positive a lot of the time.
Cultivating a Three-to-One Ratio
So I’m inviting you to challenge yourself to cultivate a three-to-one ratio of positive to negative thoughts.
This doesn’t mean being “happy clappy” or bringing toxic positivity - it can look like
Celebrating your wins, no matter how small
Practicing self-compassion in moments of self-doubt
Getting curious rather than self critical about things that went wrong
Reframing worries and insecurities in the context of what it truly important in your life
Creating innovative solutions to problems that you had never even considered by saying “what if…”
Bringing this intentional shift in mindset can lead to profound changes in how you perceive yourself and the world around you. It has the added benefit of helping you feel lighter, more positive, confident and able to tackle the challenges ahead of you with even greater ease.
Curious about your personal positivity level?
Maybe you don’t feel you are experiencing that many negative thoughts? Perhaps you are curious to see if there is a way to quantify this at all?
Well as a research turned coach, I love being able to measure things and see progress in numbers as well as more qualitative evidence.
If you're interested in learning what your personal positivity level is, consider taking the Positive Intelligence Assessment.
You’ll receive a single number score from 1-100 that explains the proportion of time you likely spend in positive vs negative thoughts. Anything over 75 means you are hitting that 3:1 ratio and will likely be facing life’s challenges with relative ease, most of the time (we all still have our moments or hit things so big its hard not to be shaken by)
Whatever your score is - remember its not a tool to beat yourself up with - its simple a benchmark and starting point from which to measure progress.
When I first took this assessment my PQ score was 38 (and that was after a lot of work on myself and thinking that I was a pretty positive person!). With the simple tools in the PQ programme and its engaging app helping me build greater mental fitness and positivity, within 6 months I was up at 65 - and let me tell you, I could REALLY feel the difference!
So if you do take the assessment and want to chat through your score and see what else mental fitness may be able to unlock for you, the you may want to consider booking a free discovery session with me to learn how I and the PQ system can support you in managing negative thoughts, inner saboteurs and cultivating more positivity and mental resilience.